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This is not a sex story. This is an article on the use of controlled daydreaming to create and experience erotic scenarios.

For many years I have tried to come up with a technique to construct and experience erotic encounters and stories, using only the power of my mind while in a conscious state. This essay will introduce the concept of Erotic Daydreaming, describing what exactly it is, what its objectives are and how it compares to alternative methods of fantasy-immersion that are currently available.


Erotic dreaming is the act of putting yourself in a daydream-like state to create and experience immersive erotic scenarios, without becoming physically aroused. In this state you are completely conscious, but through controlled daydreaming, you can bring an erotic encounter to life just using the power of your mind.

It must be made clear, as mentioned above, that the objective of erotic daydreaming is not to become physically aroused. The whole idea is that you can experience and enjoy an erotic scenario without experiencing arousal or actual climax. This means that you can engage in erotic daydreaming while in public, or at least in a situation where you may be disturbed or observed without embarrassment.


Just like any activity, Erotic Daydreaming will appeal to some and be rejected for others. In the end, each individual must decide if it would enhance their quality of life or not.

In my opinion, the Erotic Daydreaming is perfect for people who are unable to experience the specific sexual encounters or scenarios that would most interest them due to physical or situational restrictions. In my mind it may appeal mostly to people who want to experience sexual activity as the opposite sex; those who have specific fetishes they can’t physically satisfy and those who cannot experience a certain type of sexual scenario in real life, due to age, other non-gender physical restrictions, living environment or relationships. In my case, I fit into all the categories mentioned. It may also be appealing to those where pornographic content, such as literature and videos, don’t quite meet their fantasy desires.

However, Erotic Daydreaming may be less of interest for those who are satisfying their needs with real sexual activity or pornographic content. But even here, Erotic Daydreaming may still meet a specific desire that is not easily fulfilled.


Erotic daydreaming has many advantages.

1.It does not require any technology

To engage in Erotic Daydreaming at the most basic level, all you need is the power of your mind and the right ambiential surroundings. You don’t need any technology to engage it, making it very flexible.

2.You can do it in Public

You can engage in the basic activity while in the presence of other people, even in a crowded place. I have often done it while commuting. Since the objective is not physical arousal and you are only daydreaming, no one will know what you are really thinking about.

3.You are in control

You are in control of your own daydream. Each person wears and does the things that interest you. You can create your own story, that is restricted only by your imagination and your ability to visualise the fantasy world you create.

4.You can be whoever you want

You can play the hottest guy/girl you can think of. You can be the opposite sex. You can be a monster. You can be fucked by a monster. You can play two or more people in the same scenarios. You can fuck your younger self. You can be and be fucked by whoever you can imagine and appeals to you.

5.The chronology of time is flexible

Time doesn’t have to be linear in Erotic Daydreaming. You can start from the orgasm, jump back to the seduction and then jump forward to the aftermath if you so wish.

6.The story can be as long or short as you like

You can engage in a long story starting from the protagonist leaving the house to his/her reflection after a fantastic sexual encounter, which then leads on to further encounters. On the other hand, you could simply imagine a young woman flashing her panties at herself in the mirror. It can be long or short as you want.

Also events can be compressed. A sex act you imagine would take 20 minutes can be compressed into a few seconds in your mind if you want.

7. You can miss out the boring bits

You only need to concentrate on the events that interest you. Mundane activities or events (like a car journey or a college lecture) that you find dull or uninteresting you can fast-forward or miss out entirely.

8.You can use it as inspiration for other activities

Sexual daydreaming can be used as a basis for creating sexual fantasies that do lead to arousal or even for writing your own sex stories.

9.The orgasm doesn’t mean the end

As a man, when I reach climax in real sexual activity, my interest in sex falls dramatically. In Erotic Daydreaming, this does not happen; my interest remains intact. I can continue the story after climax or start a new story.

10.It doesn’t have to be all about sex

Your daydream can focus on things other than sexual activity. It could involve a romantic relationship. Or it could involve a conversation between two beautiful women discussing what a wonderful guy I am. There is more than one way to get fulfillment.

11.It’s free

It doesn’t cost anything to use.

12.Reality is what you make it

You don’t have to worry about things being realistic. You are doing this for you and you alone. You don’t need to worry about if a certain act turns on an individual or not, or whether a person acts realistically. You only need to cater for what you want and what you can accept as reality in your own fantasy world.

13.It can result in philosophical reflection

When you are a heterosexual man (like myself), pretending to be an attractive woman who is seduced by a man, you start to reflect on what it really is like to be a woman in the real world. Although the character you play and the world she is in is controlled by you, you begin to wonder what it would be like to be that person in the real world you don’t control.

And when you introduce yourself in these fantasies, either as the protagonist or as a third person, you may start to self-reflect about the person you really are, or used to be. Erotic Daydreaming can result in all sorts of self reflection. For some, this may be an interesting and intriguing side-effect to the activity.


You can immersive yourself in new characters, events and stories. You can really imagine yourself being a different person if you want to.


Erotic Daydreaming does have some disadvantages.

1.Unintended sexual arousal

When thinking of erotic scenarios, you may beome aroused more than you would like. This could take the form of a semi-erection and/or unintended discharges or perspiration. In the worst case, this may cause physical embarrassment, but in most cases it will result in nothing more than a little physical discomfort.

2.Ambiental surroundings

In order to engage in the activity effectively, you have to be in a suitable location with little distractions around you. If anything around you can disturb your train of thought, it may disrupt or even spoil your daydreaming.

3.Limitations of the mind

Erotic Daydreaming requires a lot of mental energy. If you are tired or not in a relaxed state, it may be difficult to obtain optimal results from the activity.

Also, some things in a daydream can be difficult to visualise and imagine. This can be the thrusting motion of a man, the touch of a specific piece of clothing or the vision of a specific person’s face. This can hamper your enjoyment of the daydream if these specific things are important to you.

Erotic Daydreaming requires imagination and the ability to create, visualise and physically experience a fantasy world. If you have difficulty creating your own story or visualising a world in your mind, Erotic Daydreaming could become frustrating or dissatisfying for you.


Controlled dream inducer through technology

Naturally, being able to enter a controlled dream state would be better than any daydream. However, the problem with this was that the technology doesn’t exist. It only exists in the realms of sci-fi.

Lucid Dreaming

Lucid dreaming is where you put yourself in a state of sleep and control your own dreams. If you are fortunate enough to be create lucid dreams and keep them stable, this is the best way to experience a self-created erotic fantasy. However, in practice, lucid dreaming is very difficult to achieve. And when I do achieve it, I tend to find that the dream dissipates rather quickly once your mind realises its dreaming.

Sexual Fantasies

The main difference between Erotic Daydreaming and Sexual Fantasies is the objective. The objective of sexual fantasies is to become aroused and ultimately achieve climax. As a result, the sexual fantasy tends to be more restricted and focussed than the Erotic Daydream.

3D Sex Games

There are numerous computer sex games on the market, offering both single player and MMORPG experiences. I have generally found that these never quite meet my needs as well as being clunky, time-consuming and expensive to use.

Writing Sex Stories

A couple of decades ago, I used to think that writing sex stories would help me visualise an erotic scenario. However, it never really worked. Writing stories takes a lot of time and mental energy to do properly. In the end, I could never write a story that immersed me in the story I really wanted to experience. Plus I found that after writing a story, I was not interested in reading it. I find Erotic Daydreaming easier, quicker and more satisfying to do.


For some people, erotic daydreaming can be a very worthwhile and valuable addition to their leisure activities. It is a way to fulfill our erotic dreams in an easy, cheap, discrete and immersive way.

If there is interest in this topic, I am willing to post further articles on various aspects relating to Erotic Dreaming. These are likely to cover the following topics:

Techniques for engaging in basic Erotic Dreaming

Advance techniques to enhance the experience of Erotic Dreaming

Playing the girl: A guide mainly aimed at heterosexual males (like myself) on playing the role of a female in Erotic Daydreaming

Simulating the orgasm: Techniques for simulating an orgasm in your mind during Erotic Daydreaming (without actually having one for real).

Any serious discussion on comments on this article are welcome.
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